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Black Men vs Black Women! (Why The Battle Of The Sexes)

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Surely you must know that there's a very intense "war" going on today between multitudes of Black men and Black women. This is a long running war that has pit a very large number of Black women against Black men, and a very large number of Black men against Black women. 

This is a brutal war that has for the most part manufactured a race of men and women who are suffering a great deal as a result of very severe mental, emotional and psychological scarring on both sides. 


A war that we Black people could have and should have squashed a very long time ago, but distressingly, some Brothas and Sistahs today revel 
in fueling this very bitter, out of control, ever increasing gender war to the point of destroying the.....



 Black family structure and possibly the entire Black race as a whole.


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The multitudes of Brothas and Sistahs who engaged in this harsh gender war share battle tactics consistently. They continually recruit new male and female combatants to help spread their very negative campaigns against Black men and Black women, whom they sorely despise. They do their best recruiting in just about every place each gender is most likely to gather (socially) in large numbers ie; nightclubs, sports barsbeauty salons, barbershops, fitness centers, Internet chat groups, college fraternity or sorority meetings, women's groups, men's groups, male or female oriented blogs, on their jobs and of course, in the Church and other religious organizations

They constantly bash and compete with the opposite sex on every level, from who earns the most money, to who does the best job raising Black children, to who has the better education, to who's fault it is as to why the Black race (namely the Black family unit) is declining, and even more destructively, who can "kiss" the best ass in getting validated and or excepted into Corporate America, or "socially" excepted by Euro-society aka....

                                                    Their "House-Negro!!!

On a side note: It is a very "SAD" thing when Black men and Black women today compete or seek to be validated by other cultures in order to feel good about themselves. But I digress......

With very intense scrutiny they discuss multiple (non-productive) issues such as; why they believe ALL Black men are lazy, emasculated, low down dirty dogs, or why they believe ALL Black women are greedy, selfish, masculine, and very combative, or why they believe NO Black man or NO Black woman today should be trusted, and more importantly.....

                                                    HOW TO GET EVEN!!!!!


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The average Black man or Black woman is clueless about the malice that's simmering in the hearts of these angry Brothas and hostile Sistahs who choose to join and faithfully participate in this war of the sexes. They can be found all over the Internet preaching hatred towards Black men and women while encouraging other Black males and females to weigh their options and start dating outside of the Black race.


In their impressionable minds "Two Wrongs Will Make It Right", and they are led to foolishly believe that white or other non-Black males and females are the perfect solution for Black men and women today who choose NOT to get along with or coexist with their own Brothas and Sistahs. 



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Please note: Europeans are very slow breeders due to having very weak genetics. Many of them have to incorporate  medical science in order to be successful during their high-risk, "selective breeding" process with other European males or females who are healthy enough to breed successfully. 

The average white male and female know this, and it can become very critical to the survival of their own race if an epidemic of interracial relationships began to take place. 

As a result, many Aryan white males and females believe it is "treason" for another European male or female to mix breeds with non-Europeans, namely Africans who contain the strongest genetics of any ethnic group on the planet. So this really doesn't help Black women or Black men for that matter to use another race or other ethnic groups to anger or to get even with one another. 


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"Our job is to destroy rich, prominent 
Black men and keep the Almighty 
dollar within the white race!"
To most (opportunisticwhite women today, rich, "self-hating" Black men are nothing more than ATM machines and or "sex slaves" for them.

And likewise self-hating Black women are or will become nothing more than "sex slaves" for exploitative, curious white or non-Black males as well. Whoopie Goldberg and Halle Berry are prime examples of that!

Are there exceptions to the rule? Of course! Many white and or non-Blacks have been harmed and or cast aside by their own, and as a result, they are forced to go outside of their race to find love and acceptance. However, the reality of it all is that there isn't enough mentally, emotionally or psychologically scared white or non-Black males and females to accommodate the growing multitudes of "self-hating" Black men and women today. 

Most other (non-Black) ethnic groups are very "PROUD" and very committed to who they are, and with that being said, many "self-hating" Black men and women will continue to be exploited sexually and or financially by other ethnic groups!

When it's time to really settle down and get very serious, honorable European men and women know they have a very serious obligation to "procreate" and "preserve" their own (declining) race more than any other race or ethnic group on the planet. Their own future depends on it!

Case and point: Interracial relationships are NO more guaranteed than Black-on-Black relationships. Other ethnic groups lie, cheat, break hearts and toy with emotions just as well. But more importantly, interracial relationships are NOT the solutions nor are they the answer to solving the heated gender war or bitter social interactions between "self-hating" Black men and Black women today!



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Unfortunately, In This War; All Black Men And Black Women Are Seen As The Enemy


Again, the men and women engaged in this bitter war adamantly assert that, "ALL BLACK MEN ARE NOTHING BUT LAZY, EMASCULATED, LOW-DOWN DIRTY DOGS!" or "ALL BLACK WOMEN ARE NOTHING MORE THAN;
 GREEDY, SELFISH, MASCULINE FEMALES WITH VERY NASTY ATTITUDES


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Black Men Ain't Shit, I'm going
to grab me a white boy!!!
Remarkably, they swear that NO good Black men or Black women exist today. You could be the nicest Black man a woman could ever meet, or you could be the sweetest Black woman any man could ever want, but that's a disputable point to the the average Brotha or Sistah today who foolishly carry very bitter feelings and resentment towards an entire gender, namely the opposite sex. 

To these angry males and hostile females, "All Black men are STILL dogs, or all Black women are STILL mean and nasty gold-diggers!" And as being a dog or a gold-digger, you are declared the enemy and as being the enemy, you are branded as the adversary who deserves to be fired upon by this dangerous group of Black males and females.



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To Hell With Black Women, I'm
going to get me a white chick!"
The men and women who fall for individuals from this waring brigade find out the hard way these very negative Black men and women cannot be pleased. Nor will they relinquish the hatred raging in their hearts toward the opposite sex. 

Using their supernatural gifts of suspicion, condemnation and vengeance, they ruin every relationship and or marriage they enter into. In spite of their overwhelming negative demeanor toward the opposite sex, they foolishly expect good Black men and or quality Black women to step up to the plate and take a chance to prove them wrong

                                      "LOL -  ARE THEY SERIOUS?"


For the men, as well as the women who decide to take the chance and roll the dice with one of these ticking time bombs, they eventually learn the hard way what it means to walk a tightrope on a very cold, wet and windy day.


                            The Weapons of Their Warfare:


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For The Women: The primary weapons of their warfare are just as lethal as a gun or a knife. Among many other things, they utilize the office of Child Support Enforcement and the Divorce and Family Courts as high-powered weapons in their lethal arsenal. Their silver bullets are false allegations, namely crying rape or accusing the man of mental abuse and or domestic violence

Brothas, be warned: they believe in winning this war by any means necessary, and if a man says something as innocent as; "NO", or "I DON'T WANT TO BE WITH YOU ANYMORE", these Sistahs have no compunction about dialing 911 and falsely screaming, "R-A-P-E" or domestic "A-B-U-S-E!"



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For The Men: The primary weapon of their warfare include; dating other women outside of the Black race, or they will resort to verbal, mental, emotional and often times physical abuse. These brothas use brute force, infidelity or interracial relationships as a way to get even with ALL Black women, whom they declared to be the enemy

white_woman_black_man.pngThey have NO qualms about referring to them as, or calling Black women Bitches and Hoe's or any other derogatory names other than their birth names. They also believe that by neglecting and or abandoning their own biological children, they will hurt their children's mother, who seems to be the number one enemy whom most Black men have declared war on today.


Brothas and Sistahs know this for certain…. these very contentious Black drama kings and queens will ruin your life!


Make no mistake about it; spurned by anger and vengeance, these malicious Brothas and hostile Sistahs have learned how to use the above tactics as weapons to literally destroy the lives of members of the opposite sex whom they classify as being the enemy. Their conduct is very shameful and a total disgrace to the entire Black race. I realize some Black people would rather I didn't expose our dirty laundry, but It must be revealed in order to hopefully wake up the African American masses. Remaining in denial will NOT help us, nor will it keep us from self-extermination.


Know this for sure: This gender war is NOT a game! Especially when a vindictive Sistah fraudulently puts a man's freedom and his life in jeopardy, or a hostile Brotha mentally, emotionally and physically abuses a Black woman or perhaps take her life in the process. 



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It's NOT a very pleasant environment to raise Black children in either. The arguments, the fights, the break-ups, the (gender) bashing of both parents by both the father and the mother are the primary reasons why many of our Black children (namely our boys) are very confused, rebellious, angry and emotionally withdrawn among their peers from other ethnic groups.


                                            The Victim Mentality:


No matter their conduct, these Brothas and Sistahs today classify themselves as victims. They CAN "carelessly" get pregnant by a complete stranger or "carelessly" impregnate a complete stranger whom they never intended on seeing again, but in their eyes they see themselves as guiltless


Many of these Brothas and Sistahs feel as though they have a right to show anger towards ALL Black men or ALL Black women. This is a common stance of the multitudes of Brothas and Sistahs who have enlisted themselves as bonafide Black men and women "haters" in this growing gender war today!



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The fact they use NO discretion in their choice of men, or NO discretion in their choice of women is totally irrelevant. By that I mean the fact that these females foolishly chose to be with males who were nothing more than pimps, players, dogs and thugs is completely irrelevant. And likewise, the fact that many of today's foolish Brothas choose to be with females who are very opportunistic, whorish, material and very masculine is again, totally irrelevant

The fact that they freely and willingly had one-night stands, sex outside of marriage, engage in promiscuity, maxed-out their credit cardsforfeited their entire paychecks, and more importantly, failed to display conduct that's most common of a virtuous Black woman or an Alpha-class Black male is once more totally irrelevant. They will NOT except the fact that they may be, or have been their "own" worst enemy due to the very poor choices they've made regarding individuals of the opposite sex.

God forbid you bring any of their shortcomings to their attention! Almost immediately you will be met with a barrage of hostile responses such as: "I resent that"… "I'm very offended"… "How dare you"… "I have a right to express my sexuality"… "That's an insult to a strong, independent, Black woman" or "to a hard-working, dignified Black man", followed by the most popular and the most defensive response of all-time..... 


                     "Who In The "Hell" Are You To Judge Me?”



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To be blunt, these Brothahs and Sistahs will NOT hold themselves accountable for their poor choices regarding the opposite sex. Not to their parents, their family nor their friends. Neither to God, nor to any man or woman, and certainly NOT to any type of morals, standards or human values they may have been taught very early in life. In their minds, no matter what they do or say, they were always right and everyone else was always wrong! 

They believe they are incapable of making such mistakes, or committing sin or being completely wrong when it came to choosing the wrong member of the opposite sex for companionship. Therefore, they cannot and do not stand to be corrected! Even after reading this blog post! 

Many of these hostile Brothas and vengeful Sistahs are so insolent, they gleefully attend church services anyway, deceiving themselves into believing God condones much of their hatred, unforgiveness and cunning vengeance towards the opposite sex. Very staunch believers that ALL Black men and ALL Black women are deserving of their malicious wrath, they will NEVER render an apology or a confession no matter how malicious their deeds and actions are. 


With their hardened hearts and victim's mentality, these Brothas and Sistahs mentally condition themselves, as well as empower themselves to do or say the wrong things regarding the opposite sex. And many (if not all) of them feel completely justified in doing so.


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Every man and woman who made the fatal mistake of marrying or engaging in a relationship with a hostile Brotha or a vengeful Sistah will testify today that it was one of the worst decisions of their lives! 

I encourage ALL of you reading this blog post to learn from these men and women's cruel experiences and "refrain" with every fiber of your being from having any (future) bad experiences of your own.




                        Who Or What Fuels This Menacing War?


I believe there are two primary causes for today's social and co-existing issues regarding Black men and Black women. There are many other factors as to why and how this silly, non-productive gender war came into exsistence, but I strongly believe the two "major" factors of this war are as follows:

  1) - The first primary accelerant of this gender war has become the destructive breakdown of the Black family. Maya Angelou aptly describes this breakdown in her riveting poem, "The Black Family Pledge." If you've never had the opportunity to read the pledge, I encourage you all to do so. 

                                               (Click "here" to read it). 


Also, the infamous slave owner Willie Lynch declared that the Euro-society must take full advantage of instigating the "Black man against the Black woman and the Black woman against the Black man." How was/is this possible, many of you may wonder?


Most of you who grew up in the 1970's, 80's and 90's watching so-called Black Entertainment Television, failed to see the subliminal signs of the Mainstream Media's "instigative tactics" in aiding to fuel this modern-day gender war between Black men and Black women. Our prominent  Black leaders didn't catch it. Our Black Clergy clearly missed it. And certainly many of our Brothas and Sistahs back in the 1970's, 80's and 90's clearly missed it as well, because until today, NO one spoke of it. 


                                            What Did They All Miss?

There was a very destructive, yet cleverly implemented subliminal element in every popular Black sitcom that most of us never really payed any attention to. We were too caught up in the antics, the humor, as well as the buffoonish and coonish dialogs of those shows to even notice. However, this destructive, mental conditioning element I'm referring to somehow managed to very coincidentally exist in just about every "popular" Black sitcom aired on TV during the 1970's, 80's and 90's
                                         

This (subliminal) element I'm referring to happens to be one that constantly depict Black men and Black women as nemesis, rivals and or formidable opponents of harsh retribution

                                          Please note:



  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "Good Times", there was always the rivalry between Thelma and J.J. or Wilona and Bookman!
  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "The Jeffersons", there was always the rivalry between George Jefferson and his maid Florence!
  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "Sanford & Son", there was always the rivalry between Fred and his sister-in-law Esther!
  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "Living Single", there was always the rivalry between Kyle Barker and Maxine Shaw!
  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "What's Happening", there was always the rivalry between Shirley and Rerun or Little Dee against her big brother Rodger 
  • When I turned on the very popular Black TV sitcom called "Martin", there was always the rivalry between Martin and Gina's man-hatting friend Pam! 


I know there are plenty more Black sitcoms that graced or disgraced Black male and female viewers, but I chose to use the top 6, and other than "What's Happening" the other 5 very popular yet very destructive Black sitcoms are still being aired on TV today. Why is that so? Could it be due to the fact that the mental damages those sitcoms cause is still pretty much effective today? Add to the above TV sitcoms a host of mentally destructive box-office hits, whereas the Black woman is constantly depicted as the victim and the Black man is always depicted as the villain.....what do you have? What is most likely to transpire and or conjure up in the hearts and the subconscious minds of most (younger) Black males and females?


Answer: Fear, disgust, distrust, hatred and contempt towards the opposite sex, as well as a very negative perception of Black manhood, and a complete warped view of Black Love and Gender Unity altogether. 

Could this be one of the most influential reasons why homosexuality and or bi-sexuality is rapidly increasing among our young Black males and females today?




The saddest thing of it all is that much of the mental damage most of the above TV sitcoms and movies caused among multitudes of African American males and females can NOT be reversed. 

Unfortunately, the writers and or producers for most of the above popular Black TV sitcoms of the 1970's, 80's and 90's were white and had every opportunity to subliminally implement any destructive, mental conditioning element(s) of their choice within the scripts of those Black sitcoms. And sadly, many Black writers and producers today are following the same destructive, stereotypical trends! 


For example: Tyler Perry's Madea and Brown are/were constant rivals in just about every one of his stage and or movie productions. 

Also: Why is that "Everybody Loves Raymond", yet "Everybody Hates Chris?" 

The above are NOT some strange coincidences people, they are subliminal messages, as well as very clairvoyant mental conditioning tactics on behalf of the Mainstream Media!!!



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"UNPLUG THE DRUG AND PICK UP A BOOK!"


"Are or were the Coonish antics of the above sitcoms more mentally destructive than they are/were funny?" 


                                                   Absolutely!!!!

The above negative depictions of Black male and female social behaviors and the Black family structure even in the form of Black entertainment television (and music) have been very instrumental in supplying a steady stream of Brothas and Sistahs into our society who have been mentally conditioned to devalue, disdain, distrust, disrespect one another and or the opposite sex, or who have no qualms about hurting, harming and discrediting one another, as well as the opposite sex. Even today, many Black Entertainment industries, namely reality TV continue to perpetuate the "victim mentality" in the hearts and the minds of the multitudes of Black men and women who foolishly continue to patronize them.



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Again, on the men's side of this fierce war, we have produced a mass number of Brothas who are glaringly misogynistic and abusive. They display their misogyny by committing abuse and domestic violence. Gleefully disrespecting and devaluing Black women while intentionally playing games with their emotions and feelings.

Cursing Black women, referring to them as, bitches, hoes and other profane names - while ingeniously classifying what they say and do as freedom of speech and artistic expression as it pertains to Rap, R&B and other so-called Black entertainment. They will impregnate a woman then abandon their own biological flesh and blood without any regards, shame or guilt.


These misogynistic Brothas are flagrant and non-empathetic or apologetic. They brag about being pimps, players and thugs. They commit date rape and jokingly boast about the Black women they have lied to, used, abused, mistreated and or harmed. They take great joy in producing misogynistic music and otherwise creating an environment that convinces other Black males it is a code of ethics to hurt, harm and totally disrespect African American women.



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            "Any Thing a Man Can Do We Can Do Better!"




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Again, on the women's side of this fierce war, we have produced a multitude of Sistahs who are very dangerous for a number of reasons. Some were brainwashed by their demoralizing showbiz heroines; such as Tyler Perry's Madea. And many were brainwashed by the Black movie industry which again, constantly depicts Black women as the victim. 

Movies such as Waiting To Exhale, A Thin Line Between Love And Hate, The Color Purple, Jungle Fever, How Stella Got Her Groove Back, Diary Of A Mad Black Woman, and many others. 

Also, many Black women today are being negatively influenced by their female music icons such as; Lil Kim, Rhiana, Nicky Minaj and a host others to view sex, money and men as a sport, pursue materialism and that men, namely Black men are not to be trusted. Others were influenced into promiscuity, materialism and into becoming bonafied man-haters by their reckless mothers, aunts, cousins, female friends and peer groups.

While joyfully expressing their sexuality, these very loose Sistahs unknowingly hurl themselves into the HIV/AIDS epidemic arena that is also devouring their fellow Sistahs, cousins, and friends, which contributes to the overall decimation of the Black family unit, and the Black race as a whole.


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Some of them were raised in homes and situations in which they were abused, molested or otherwise mentally, emotionally or psychologically harmed by a Black male. Or perhaps they hate ALL Black men because their Black fathers were not there for them. And in almost every case their mentalemotional and psychological scars ran very very deep. Oftentimes, when they grow up - they seek revenge for what was done to them by someone of the opposite sex when they were very very young.


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If not vengeance, these damaged females go on bewildering paths of self-destruction, devaluing themselves in every way possible, seeking love and or attention in all the wrong places, for all of the wrong reasons, with the wrong males who are seeking nothing more than to exploit these female's hardship for their own personal gain. They can be found all over the Internet shaking and twerking their "half-naked" bodies, while leaving nothing to the imagination. 

This is also how and why many African American women shamefully end up in the porn industry doing just about any and everything with lustful males, as well as other females from just about every race and ethnic group there is. 

Without any form of pride, honordignity and self-respect, or for the right price, she willingly relinquishes her position as being an African Queen to quickly become someones Porn Queen, then foolishly fail to understand why she's being disrespected and treated like a whore or a prostitute!


2) - The pictures below clearly depicts what I believe are the second "major" causes for the growing gender war between Black men and Black women today.


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                                                         AND LIKEWISE....


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We have NO one else to blame for the damagingself-inflicted wounds depicted above!!!!

These are issues we can NOT deny. Neither can we afford to completely down-play them. We have got to "STOP", "RESET " and completely "REFOCUS" our cultural morals, obligations and expectations, especially as it pertains to how Black men and Black women value one another and how determined they are to co-exist together, while at the same time "COMMIT" to working out their differences as men and women. To begin with, we must "individuallyinoculate ourselves from the madness and the devastating affects of today's full-blown gender war between Black men and Black women!


How do good brothas and sistahs inoculate themselves from the madness of today's highly volatile gender war? The only way is by becoming a "conscious objector!"

                      Becoming a Conscious Objector


To be a conscious objector to today's growing Black gender war means that you will consciously apply my three proven vital preventive measures below:


1) - You must refrain from being recruited as a combatant. That means you must refuse to dishonor, disrespect or disgrace any Black man or any Black woman. It means that no matter their disposition - you never retaliate! You treat all Black men and Black women with the highest level of dignity, integrity, respect and fidelity. That is how honorable and dignified Black men and women are suppose to conduct themselves. If you are a man or a woman of prayer, pray for our hostile Brothas and vengeful Sistahs. Many of them are hurting deep within. Pray and ask God for the healing of their hearts. 

2) - You must learn to identify these Black male and female "haters" and refrain from engaging in a relationship, marriage, debate or verbal shouting matches with them. You will get nowhere except further fueling their fire and inciting them to even more hostility towards the opposite sex. Know this for certain: These scrappy Brothas and Sistahs love to fightargue with and discredit the opposite sex. Don't become their next opponent, target, victim and ultimately, their next casualty of war.


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You can suggest they seek help or to obtain counseling, but unfortunately, most of these violent Brothas and hostile Sistahs on the battlefield are rarely willing to admit they have a problem with the opposite sex. No matter how glaringly obvious it is. They are "self-designatedcombatants in today's heated gender war between Black men and Black women, and neither of them will be willing to comply with any peace treaty. Not even if the order comes from God Almighty Himself!


3) - Only seek Brothas and or Sistahs who are also a conscious objector to today's gender war and treat him like a KING and her like a QUEEN! This last step means "you must learn how to choose your mate wisely." Yes, there are a great deal of men and women who are on the warpath, but thankfully, all of our Brothas and Sistahs are NOT engaged in this brutal war of bitter words and harmful deeds. 



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"Kanye, why are Black women so upset with me 
today when many of them view Black men as 
being their #1 enemy?" 
And the Brothas and Sistahs who are NOT engaged in this foolish drama - are some of the most honorable Black men and women on Earth. These Brothas and Sistahs are well worth your time and effort to seek out and be patience with!

 Why should  other cultures benefit our very best Black men and Black women. Why are we allowing non-Black men and non-Black women to have the best of both worlds today? 

Drama - free Black men and women are truly relationship material, and unlike so many others, honorable Black men and women today, they too are sick and tired of the foolish, counterproductive gender war between self-hating Black men and women.... 


                                              How about you?





                               ALL THOUGHTS WELCOME!



8 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is a pretty good article, I like that it was balanced all the way through showing the negative ends of both sides at least. That is a major plus.

But when it comes to kanye west wasn't he one of the bm celebrities who disliked or didn't hire dark skin bw? A lot of bm like that, as evidenced by his stereotypical comment, would never really give a bw a chance. He values non bw so hes willing to take a chance on them despite their history od among other heinous activities, being the biggest gold diggers &they aint even coy about it.

Its always been seen as birthright that the ww be taken care of, most wm treat them that way as his queen enjoying the spoils of their historical black exploitation. And bm tend to want to copy the wm these days by stepping into his shoes &sharing his value system so they don't view being generous and taking care of ww as ww being a gold digger. While if a bw they often mooch off when struggling asks them for gas money or to help pay the rent, they gold diggers. Such stereotypes are just excuses for why they favor non bw when the real reason is racism and self hate.

I also feel his song depicting bw as gold diggers (emminim made one as well) is a prefect example of exaggerated propaganda bm help spread as an excuse to go after the true gold diggers; non bw they value enough to pay the price for as they are seen as valuable status symbols to these self haters.

I was in asia once and saw bm marrying prostitutes right off the str they treat like queens while calling bw they know nothing about whores. Also don't forget until recently most bw were in the church praying for god to send them a good bm husband &plenty were virgins. But not many bm attended church, most were in the clubs or saw the church as a hunting ground. Doesn't matter what a woman does if a man doesn't value her based on something she cant change like race.

Also knowing in reality that bw being the gold digger to bm is less likely then bm being gold diggers to bw. Since most bm who really got or come into any money either dump the bw they already with or diss bw altogether and seek non bw. I even saw a program being hosted by a wealthy bm providing a dating service for wealthy bm seeking ww to date, take care of financially, and potentially marry.

shemika

Unknown said...

I agree this article was generally more balanced than the previous articles I have read from here. I really though feel it could have ended on a different note... Kanye really cannot be the photo and summation you end up with and kind of undoes much of what was said earlier on. In the end people must be free to choose whichever partner they want I don't want to make this about Kanye. Instead I don't think we should put responsibility for his choice on the black woman - that kind of undoes the earlier argument. I also have a general problem in that the "gender" issue is only looked at from white oppression tactics, and no insight on male / female dynamics of being part of a patriarchal society. I agree with much of this article but it would have been, in my personal view, been even more balanced with we look at how patriarchal systems which are African contribute to violence against black women. Slavery, colonialism and racism exacerbates the plight of the black woman, and to remove that will make thing a whole lot better, but will not deal with the inherent patriachal practices, system and attitudes that see women as "less than"

Gregory C. said...

First and foremost, I would like to thank you Diane for sharing your opinions and perceptions regarding this topic. Thanks again!

Now I would like to take the opportunity to respond to some of your remarks:

1)- YOUR COMMENT: "I agree this article was generally more balanced than the previous articles I have read from here."

MY RESPONSE: The primary purpose for "BALANCE" within this particular post is because the title of this post includes both Black men and Black women, and the role each gender play regarding our social and co-existing issues as a race.

2)- YOUR COMMENT: "I really though feel it could have ended on a different note... Kanye really cannot be the photo and summation you end up with and kind of undoes much of what was said earlier on."

MY RESPONSE: Kanye is/was NOT the focus of this post, nor is/was he the focus of the photo. It was Kim's remark that highlighted the photo, as well as to illustrate as to why Black women claim to hate and distrust ALL Black men but have a very serious problem with Black men finding true love and happiness with other women outside the Black race. That was the actual point the photo made reference to.

Gregory C. said...

3) - YOUR COMMENT: "Instead I don't think we should put responsibility for his choice on the black woman - that kind of undoes the earlier argument."

MY RESPONSE: Who else is responsible for certain Black men not wanting to be with certain Black women today? We can't always blame the Brothas for just wanting to be loved and respected. I wouldn't want to be with a race or group of women who constantly declare "THEY DON'T NEED BLACK MEN!" There are multitudes of Black men today who just don't want to be with Black women for the above reasons. And I'm quite sure they may have other personal reasons as to why they don't want to be with Black women, but it is what it is. Again, read the negative roles Black women play in today's non-productive gender war.

4) - YOUR COMMENT: "I also have a general problem in that the "gender" issue is only looked at from white oppression tactics, and no insight on male / female dynamics of being part of a patriarchal society."

MY RESPONSE: I totally disagree! There's NO question about it.....most of our culture issues today stem from how the Black man and the Black woman were mentally conditioned from slavery and beyond. So yes....white oppression is to be considered a great deal for much of our cultural and or gender issues today. White oppression may not be the only reason for our gender issues, but it plays a major role as to why many African people yesterday and today distrust, disdain, degrade, disrespect, disregard, and ultimately "hate" other African men and women who looks exactly like them!

5) - "I agree with much of this article but it would have been, in my personal view, been even more balanced with we look at how patriarchal systems which are African contribute to violence against black women."

MY RESPONSE: Your above statement is also the problem in which I covered in the article, were as the Black woman is always claiming to be the victim and the Black man is always the villain. Thanks again for sharing your thoughts and opinions Ms. Brown.

knaturaldiva said...

Great article. More of us black women need to read and receive this article.

Trina said...

This is a great article to help out Black women who obviously struggle with dating because their feminist mentality is not conducive to finding romantic relations and marital bliss with men, particularly Black men who, through social media, have been made more aware of feminist Black women adding on to the lack of the appeal of feminist Black women, but what about Black women, such as myself, who have been typecast to be the "I'm an independent, strong Black woman and I don't need a man, but I dream of being married to one"? I do not relate to this type of woman.

As hard as I am on myself, I'm not arrogant enough to have grandios opinions of my attractiveness, but I do believe I'm a fairly attractive woman with a decent hour glass figure. I constantly deal with out right rejection the moment a Black man lays eyes on me and sees that I'm Black. He has no clue if I'm the sweet, church going lady praying for a husband, or if I'm the natural haired activist or the squared away career woman with tons of formal education, or if I'm of the feminist persuasion until he tries to basically date me and get to know me and I constantly face the reality that I might have to jump ship and swim over to another race of men who display interest. Quality Black women who desire relationships don't say foolish things like, "I don't need a man." I'm not apart of that group. There's many puzzled Black women like myself who should have a man but don't because we are instantly stereotyped to have the undesirable attributes you so tediously laid out.

Has a spell been prayed over the Black race? We are so brain washed into believing we should expect the worse from other Black men and women. The spell needs to be forever broken.

Unknown said...

Btw thanks for this article it is very enlightening...kudos

World Traveler said...

By far this is the most balanced and unbiased blog touching on this problem, this silent war that has been staged and waged between black men and women in America. Off and on I have tried to understand not only HOW but WHY this is happening. I too as a black man have long since opted out of dating let alone marry any black woman here in America due to my experiencing some of the toxic behaviors that many of them have displayed during my early teens, my 20's and slightly beyond.

This is to include the shaming tactics that both my black male peers and many of the black females that I turned to for wisdom and guidance. Those tactics raged from accusations of self-hatred, loss of identity, being less of a man, hatred of my parents and my personal favorite "not black enough". I like many of my brothers and sisters here in America have been harmed and cast aside and or ostracized by their own people simply because they were different, they “didn’t fit in” with the cultural norms (I.E. the stereotypical behavior/s) that have been widely and loosely associated with the poor black community.

This is what led me to look at my own culture and where I come from differently. What I find most amusing is how (when shit hits the fan) that suddenly I'm expected to stand shoulder to shoulder with the very same black people who caused me to feel like this. When I was stationed in Germany, (Where I felt a sense of acceptance by the people of Bayern) I noticed how many of my fellow black female soldiers felt ignored because the German women were snatching up brothers right and left.

In the defense of the German women, and (speaking primarily from experience) The German women were (for the most part) Physically attractive, they actually gave you the time of day without the harsh rejections that my fellow black females from America were notoriously known for.

Fast-forward to today, recently I have noticed a quiet influx of black men who are abandoning the idea of dating let alone marrying black women here in America, what IS happening is that brothers are getting passports and searching elsewhere to find women of color who meet their requirements which aren't limited to just physical beauty. For a while now brothers were venturing to Brazil, now that landscape has expanded to South America, The Dominican Republic and countries similar to Brazil and DR.

To the Author of this Blog I salute you for sparing neither side any quarter, for saying what EVERYONE who is affected by this war have struggled to say be it in private discussions on social media an YouTube…

Lastly I salute you for checking the naysayers no matter WHAT tactics they attempt to use to dilute your point!!!!